The Color of Her Eyes

I was curling my hair that's just gonna end up in a ponytail anyway.  No make up yet.  My neck and back making every move I make hurt.
A song came on the radio.  I heard it and took a deep breath.  The song is about a young crush never seen again, but the chorus says "Rachel" to me. My edits in parentheses...

"I can't help but wonder if you ever miss me....

I haven't seen you in ages.

Sometimes I find myself wondering...where...you...are.

To me, you'll always be 18. (my baby)

And Beautiful.

And dancing away with my heart...."

I decided it was a convenient time to cry without the extra effort of worrying about my mascara.

And so I cried.

I'm so tired of this.  The Fridays seem to come and go quickly, yet it feels like it's been forever.  I wish I had a good memory to hold on to that wasn't created in an attempt to not only have sad ones.  I wish I knew what color her eyes were.  I can't remember.  I think gray, but were they or do I not know because I was afraid to look into them?  Did I?  I don't know. I thought I did. Shouldn't I know this? 

Why don't I know?  Or did I forget?  I don't know.

So, guess what's playing now....

Garth Brooks - The Dance

Holding you, I held everything

For a moment wasn't I a king

But if I'd only known how the king would fall

Hey who's to say? you know I might have changed it all

And now I'm glad I didn't know

The way it all would end the way it all would go

Our lives are better left to chance

I could have missed the pain

But I'd have had to miss the dance

And the song that came on next....the chorus starts with:

"Her eyes were blue, Her hair was long"

Her hair was long....Maybe she did have my eyes...  ??