The big question: Did you deactivate your facebook?
The answer: Yes, I did.
I am not sure I will be going back at all - or if I do what I will do to fix my problem... but I have found that the risks are not outweighing the benefits.
I originally only started using Facebook as a way to share my blog posts - and it works unbelievably. On Rachel's birthday, I would give Facebook much of the credit for how many people were watching and praying. People shared my blog with everyone they knew and it landed over 4,000 people on my blog the day she came and went. It was amazing. So, after I saw that, I started using it. I also accepted every 'friend request' I got, regardless of if I knew them because my blog is public and so it didn't seem to really matter. I had a different purpose than most for using it at all. Out of the 400 something 'friends' I have, I only initiated like 3 of them! And many I do not know at all. Over time though, I have started using it more personally, and this becomes a problem.
People taking photos that don't belong to them. Stalker-ish behaviors. Arguments and other things that would have never happened without it. And that is just some of it.... never mind the time I lose reading (albeit, sometimes funny and sometimes nice to know) random stuff and having a false idea of support and friendship. Never knowing who is really there or not, and expecting "likes" or short comments to make each other feel like we are connected. It works in some ways, but in others, not so much.
In the past two days, I have seen a dramatic difference in the number of views on my posts since I made that change. I am hoping once everyone figures out they have to come here directly, that will change. I won't lie, it makes me nervous. If I do go back to Facebook, that will be my #1 reason.
I waited to post my "Open Casket" post to see how many people go directly to my blog without relying on my posting it to Facebook to read. It was at around 14 after many hours. I posted it to Facebook and within an hour, it was up close to 150. Not sure how to reconcile that at this point. I've posted the recent posts to my Baby Rachel's Legacy FB Page in hopes it will help without me having to use a personal page - but it doesn't appear to be making a difference. (Can you 'like' and follow me there?)
In the end, I have to remember that I started - and was sharing her story across the world - without Facebook... God did that and He doesn't need Facebook. But for some reason, I struggle to believe I don't. We'll see how long my heart can take the small amount of views before I give in! It's rough timing with all the changes I just made in my plans for events this coming year. I don't want to let it all slip away......
Still here, with or without FB <3
ReplyDeleteLove & Light!
It's brave of you to take this step, and all the others you've taken in such a short time. I agree, while Facebook has its uses, it can also muddle things up as well.
ReplyDeleteWant you to know that I'm still here, and think about you, Rachel, Matt, Desirae, Isaiah, Sam, Asa and Baby E all the time. Love, hugs and prayers pretty lady xxx
Chloe, I'll have to get your email address!
DeleteI always go direct to your blog, it's in my favorites. :-) Facebook is, at times, a drama infested high school, so I commend you for giving it up. I am still here and reading your posts, and think about Rachel often. It's the little things... I was getting my daughter dressed the other day and noticed her shirt had daisies on it.. and immediately I thought of Rachel. ♥
ReplyDeleteGot to know you here before FB, and I'm still here too, with or without FB! This is where I've always come first and this is where I'll continue to come. I don't always comment as often as I'd like however I ALWAYS read each and every post!
ReplyDeleteGeez, Stacy............I am sorry. I depended on FB to bring me back to your new posts. BUT now that i know I will check in here. I tried finding the other page but had no luck. Anyways I too am still here with or without FB.
ReplyDeletei check for your updates straight on the blog!!! love to read how you and everyone else are doing!!!
ReplyDeleteMy best friend forward me a link to your blog tonight titled "Open Casket" She too lost her baby to anenchepaly 12 years ago. She told me your blog said the things she's been
ReplyDeletewanting to tell me. You see, my daughter and
son in law are expecting their first child in
Jan. My first grandbaby. When we went to the
gender reveal ultra sound at 18 weeks they
discovered a major complication. The baby
only has one kidney and it's enlarged and not
functioning. The Dr told us that day he/she
would die at birth. We are heartbroken. The
options were to terminate pregnancy or
continue with birth. Since God is the ultimate
giver and taker of life, my daughter is
choosing to carry the baby till God calls
our little one home. So, my best friend has been trying to help me prepare for what's to come in the next few months
When she came across your blog she thought it was what I needed to hear. And, as I read this post and others, I agree. What a blessing you are to others who are facing similar fears and challenges. It's admirable of you to post such personal thoughts for the public to read but what a legacy you are leaving for your beautiful daughter. I am comforted by your experience and have great hope our family will find God's blessings in the smallest of things. I just wanted to say thank you for sharing (with or without facebook)
Amey
My best friend forward me a link to your blog tonight titled "Open Casket" She too lost her baby to anenchepaly 12 years ago. She told me your blog said the things she's been
ReplyDeletewanting to tell me. You see, my daughter and
son in law are expecting their first child in
Jan. My first grandbaby. When we went to the
gender reveal ultra sound at 18 weeks they
discovered a major complication. The baby
only has one kidney and it's enlarged and not
functioning. The Dr told us that day he/she
would die at birth. We are heartbroken. The
options were to terminate pregnancy or
continue with birth. Since God is the ultimate
giver and taker of life, my daughter is
choosing to carry the baby till God calls
our little one home. So, my best friend has been trying to help me prepare for what's to come in the next few months
When she came across your blog she thought it was what I needed to hear. And, as I read this post and others, I agree. What a blessing you are to others who are facing similar fears and challenges. It's admirable of you to post such personal thoughts for the public to read but what a legacy you are leaving for your beautiful daughter. I am comforted by your experience and have great hope our family will find God's blessings in the smallest of things. I just wanted to say thank you for sharing (with or without facebook)
Amey
Amey,
DeleteI'm so sorry to hear about your grandbaby... And very thankful that you find my blog comforting. Please feel free to email me at RachelsMama@ymail.com and to pass this on to your daughter. It's a long road, but our babies are so worth it. Praying for your aching heart.
love & hope,
Stacy