New Baby Stuff

I had my first doctor's appt today.  She was asking me who I had for support.... I LOVE that question!  Well, I have an amazing husband, a mother and sister that I talk to daily, a big church family and 300 people a day on my blog, including dozens of other baby loss mamas and a God Who never leaves me alone!  I am so blessed. 

She scheduled an ultrasound for me tomorrow.  I'm mostly excited, but some nervous.  It's at Garrison and I haven't been there since the ultrasound when I had my miscarriage.  I'm also most likely going alone since it was such short notice and Matt might not be able to make his schedule work around it.  I feel pretty hopeful that everything will go okay, but there isn't much to see at only 7 weeks.  I had an u/s this early with Rachel and although they told me everything was fine, I knew when they said she was measuring small that something wasn't right.  They claimed I must have ovulated late... I know my body and knew that wasn't the case.  Her heart rate was low, they said that's normal too.  I questioned it all again and again and got "don't worry, everything's normal".  So, I'm hoping that nothing like that happens tomorrow.  Just a straight forward strong heart beat and normal size.  Please pray for me, my appt is at 1:15.  Also pray that Matt will be able to make it there for his lunch break.

I am surprising myself with how little I want to know... I thought that when I got pregnant again I would be anxious for all the answers right away - but I'm actually feeling the opposite.  I always said that I was glad I didn't know sooner with Rachel.  It was a long enough road as it was.   My plan (does that make you nervous when I say my plan? It does me!) is to do whatever I would normally do with any other baby.  And normally, if they offered me an early ultrasound, I would take it - so I did.  I have specific tests I normally do - and ones I don't... and I plan to keep that all the same.  I'm refusing to let fear or worry dictate my decisions with this pregnancy.  I know God is in control and He did not bring me this far to drop me and leave me.  He will be with me and He will guide me through each decision I have to make, even though some of them won't be easy.  Maybe I'll have a pic for you tomorrow!! :o)