Monday, November 21, 2011

Rachel's Birthday Invitation - * New Posts Below*

I wrote a post regarding Rachel's birthday a couple weeks ago that I never posted, mostly because it felt like a big ball of negativity... my feelings are so raw and my emotions at an ultimate low in my grief right now. 

The short version is that I had been lamenting over how to celebrate her birthday, which happens to also be the day she died, while grieving so deeply.  Most people don't celebrate the day their children die - but for all of us who welcomed our babies and then had to let them go, it's more complicated.  The last thing I wanted was to try to plan something and be let down again by detached family and busy friends.  So I was at a point where I was thinking maybe I should skip it all together.

What I realized is that I was letting my fear of being hurt and being overwhelmed with sadness override my desire to do something for my girl.  It would be different if I didn't want to do something, but I do - and so that just isn't acceptable....  so I'm planning a party. 

My heart's desire is to keep giving to others in Rachel's honor - and so months ago, I started praying that the Lord would direct me in the right way to a pregnant woman who needed help that we could sponsor in Rachel's memory.  I had very specific requests - I wanted a woman, pregnant with a girl, who was due in December.  I thought we could have everyone bring a baby girl gift and then donate it to them.  I assumed I was going to have to call Community Action or something to find someone, but kept putting it off because that would most likely have to be anonymous and I wanted the receiver to know about Rachel and why we were doing this.  I also was afraid to commit to helping someone without knowing if others would be supportive of my idea because we are going to need the help of family and friends to make it possible.  Well, after months of being unsure which way to go - one day I went to the local gas station to get a coffee...

The woman there had been talking with me regularly when I would go in about my baby belly, but this one morning, she mentioned that her 21 year old daughter was pregnant too and due with a girl 5 weeks after me.  I told her I had recently lost a girl, she gave her condolences and I left.

I couldn't get this girl off my mind and I don't even know her.  I decided to bring her the shirt my mom had bought for my baby when I was first pregnant (she insisted I was having a girl) that was a girl shirt and said "Born in 2011".  I brought it in one morning and gave it to her with one of my blog cards (I made up business cards with my blog info on them after we got Rachel's diagnosis and Matt & I have handed out hundreds of them as we shared about our precious girl)  Well, she took one look at the card and started crying, came around the counter and gave me a hug and said "I didn't know that was you, your husband gave me one of these when you first found out and I've read your blog.  I don't know how you did that, you're so strong"  I always love the opportunity to say "no, I'm not, but my God is."

As the days past, I kept thinking about her daughter and it dawned on me that she must be due in December.  I wanted to talk to the woman from the gas station about sponsoring her, but it's an odd subject to bring up while paying for a coffee.  So, last Saturday, when the kids & I walked down to get a hot chocolate, I had been thinking that it was too bad I wouldn't see her that day since she only works week days.  I opened the door to go in, and there she was...buying a coffee!  So I told her what I wanted to do and she said her daughter could use the help....

And so that is what we're doing.  She is due on December 23 (Rachel's due date was the 25th) and is having a little girl.  I knew last Saturday when all the pieces came together, that this is exactly where God wants us to help this year.  I smiled the whole way home from the store cause I didn't even want to be out that morning ( I hadn't walked that far in MONTHS), but forced myself to make the trip - and God had something waiting for me there!

So,  I'm asking everyone to purchase gift cards from Target or Walmart and send them to us before Rachel's birthday (December 3) and on Rachel's birthday we will go out and buy however much we can with them for this young mom and her sweet daughter.  If you are able to send even $5 it will help.  I really want to bless this young family.

Lisa Borders - who has been doing the editing on Rachel's photos, helped me do an official invitation for this... (thanks, Lisa!)
If you are able to join us in sponsoring this family in Rachel's honor, we would appreciate it very much.  You can send gift cards to:

Baby Rachel's Legacy
PO Box 454
Rochester, NH 03866-0454

If you are in the area and would like to join us, we will also be doing a balloon release at her grave at 1pm on Saturday, December 3rd.  We would love to have you there with us if you can make it.  Contact me if you need directions.


  1. Oh Stace, that's so beautiful. Blessing this girl will ALWAYS be remembered - by her and others. Still leaving her legacy for sure!

    I soooo wish I could be there on Dec 3 to release balloons with you. I will be releasing one here for sweet Rachel. What colour balloons are you having? Yellow? pink?

  2. What a beautiful idea! Remembering Rachel and help another family...
    Love, anja

  3. What a great idea Stacy! I love how this other sweet mom and baby will be so deeply blessed by Rachel's Legacy.

  4. Stacy - I'm so glad to see that things are falling into place for Rachel's birthday! It will be a special day where her life and legacy will be celebrated <3
    Please let me know if you need any help with the balloons or anything else.

  5. I have tears in my eyes as I read this! What a beautiful way to celebrate your precious girl's birthday! God is so good to have shown you who to bless in this way! I pray that He continues to use you and Matt and Rachel mightily in the lives of those you meet!

    Hugs, love, and prayers....

  6. How absolutely wondering and honoring to Rachel's life to help another mother in need!

    Our little girl's birthday was very difficult for me; my thoughts and prayers will be with you. Be gentle on yourself, Mama.

    Wish I could be there in person to laugh and cry with you.



  7. So sweet. I love that. Happy Happy Birthday sweet Rachel. I hope that you have a beautiful time with your family remembering your sweet girl, their sister...

  8. What a great way to honor Rachel!


We so appreciate your words of encouragement!
Thank you! ♥ The Aubes