Rachel's Birthday Invitation - * New Posts Below*

I wrote a post regarding Rachel's birthday a couple weeks ago that I never posted, mostly because it felt like a big ball of negativity... my feelings are so raw and my emotions at an ultimate low in my grief right now. 

The short version is that I had been lamenting over how to celebrate her birthday, which happens to also be the day she died, while grieving so deeply.  Most people don't celebrate the day their children die - but for all of us who welcomed our babies and then had to let them go, it's more complicated.  The last thing I wanted was to try to plan something and be let down again by detached family and busy friends.  So I was at a point where I was thinking maybe I should skip it all together.

What I realized is that I was letting my fear of being hurt and being overwhelmed with sadness override my desire to do something for my girl.  It would be different if I didn't want to do something, but I do - and so that just isn't acceptable....  so I'm planning a party. 

My heart's desire is to keep giving to others in Rachel's honor - and so months ago, I started praying that the Lord would direct me in the right way to a pregnant woman who needed help that we could sponsor in Rachel's memory.  I had very specific requests - I wanted a woman, pregnant with a girl, who was due in December.  I thought we could have everyone bring a baby girl gift and then donate it to them.  I assumed I was going to have to call Community Action or something to find someone, but kept putting it off because that would most likely have to be anonymous and I wanted the receiver to know about Rachel and why we were doing this.  I also was afraid to commit to helping someone without knowing if others would be supportive of my idea because we are going to need the help of family and friends to make it possible.  Well, after months of being unsure which way to go - one day I went to the local gas station to get a coffee...

The woman there had been talking with me regularly when I would go in about my baby belly, but this one morning, she mentioned that her 21 year old daughter was pregnant too and due with a girl 5 weeks after me.  I told her I had recently lost a girl, she gave her condolences and I left.

I couldn't get this girl off my mind and I don't even know her.  I decided to bring her the shirt my mom had bought for my baby when I was first pregnant (she insisted I was having a girl) that was a girl shirt and said "Born in 2011".  I brought it in one morning and gave it to her with one of my blog cards (I made up business cards with my blog info on them after we got Rachel's diagnosis and Matt & I have handed out hundreds of them as we shared about our precious girl)  Well, she took one look at the card and started crying, came around the counter and gave me a hug and said "I didn't know that was you, your husband gave me one of these when you first found out and I've read your blog.  I don't know how you did that, you're so strong"  I always love the opportunity to say "no, I'm not, but my God is."

As the days past, I kept thinking about her daughter and it dawned on me that she must be due in December.  I wanted to talk to the woman from the gas station about sponsoring her, but it's an odd subject to bring up while paying for a coffee.  So, last Saturday, when the kids & I walked down to get a hot chocolate, I had been thinking that it was too bad I wouldn't see her that day since she only works week days.  I opened the door to go in, and there she was...buying a coffee!  So I told her what I wanted to do and she said her daughter could use the help....

And so that is what we're doing.  She is due on December 23 (Rachel's due date was the 25th) and is having a little girl.  I knew last Saturday when all the pieces came together, that this is exactly where God wants us to help this year.  I smiled the whole way home from the store cause I didn't even want to be out that morning ( I hadn't walked that far in MONTHS), but forced myself to make the trip - and God had something waiting for me there!

So,  I'm asking everyone to purchase gift cards from Target or Walmart and send them to us before Rachel's birthday (December 3) and on Rachel's birthday we will go out and buy however much we can with them for this young mom and her sweet daughter.  If you are able to send even $5 it will help.  I really want to bless this young family.

Lisa Borders - who has been doing the editing on Rachel's photos, helped me do an official invitation for this... (thanks, Lisa!)

If you are able to join us in sponsoring this family in Rachel's honor, we would appreciate it very much.  You can send gift cards to:

Baby Rachel's Legacy
PO Box 454
Rochester, NH 03866-0454

If you are in the area and would like to join us, we will also be doing a balloon release at her grave at 1pm on Saturday, December 3rd.  We would love to have you there with us if you can make it.  Contact me if you need directions.