Friday, December 9, 2011

Surviving Another Anniversary

Tough night tonight.  should be sleeping, but my mind won't shut off.  My heart is so heavy.  Tomorrow (today) is a year since we buried my girl.  And it's also a Friday.  I'll need extra prayers to get through this day. 

This day, unlike her birthday, holds nothing but deep sorrow and heart wrenching pain in my memory.  Her service was beautiful and I made it through the day alive, but that night I had to force myself to stay home...I just wanted to go back and dig her up.  It felt so wrong to put my baby in the ground.  I filled in the funeral home book like it was a baby book, obsessing over every detail as if she would someday read it.  And I cried all night long.

Some days surviving was all I could do.  Some days it still is.  Today is one of them.


  1. Oh honey. My heart cries with yours tonight. Hard, hard. Love to you xx

  2. Thinking of you, Rachel and your family. Wishing I could hug you (for both of our sakes :). You are an amazing momma . . . amazing woman. Praying for you today and always.

  3. praying for you and your family.

  4. Jesus holds your hand as you take each breath, each step through this day and mourns with you. Matthew 5:4: “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Only He knows how you will be comforted and us imperfect humans will do our best to be a part of the comfort you receive.

  5. I too wish I could give you a hug! Lord knows we could both use it today. Praying for your heart tonight!


We so appreciate your words of encouragement!
Thank you! ♥ The Aubes