Places: By the Fire

The quaint living room at the camp held some very special memories this year.  Late night conversations, cribbage, warm fires and s'mores... laughter and tears. 

Isaiah mastered the art of starting a fire all on his own (he even helped cut some of the wood!)  He was so excited and he marveled at the outcome of his hard work.  He 'taught' me how as he prepared it and I thoroughly enjoyed pretending like every step he instructed me on was new information to me.  

Desirae sat at the end of the couch as I lay and listen to her talk.  She was telling me all about her computer game.  Normally I would be too busy to listen to this cause I don't actually care about her computer games - but as she talked I realized how much I miss out on when I don't stop to listen to what's going on in her world.  Because as she told me about her 'virtual family' she shared how important it was for her that she picked a husband who wanted a lot of kids.... she was talking about the game, but as she did, I entered into her heart space and saw bits and pieces of her hopes and dreams for the future.  I didn't know until that night that Desirae wants a large family - or how incredibly funny she is and how animated her stories are - she's usually so quiet.  I was able to speak into her life as we talked about what she will look for in a husband, what she wants to do for a job, and what she will name her kids.  It brought me so much joy to see her trust me and talk to me like that.  She is growing up so fast.

Samuel ate lots of marshmallows, most of which were on a stick, but not toasted!  He seemed to enjoy them just the same.  He would stick them on and start eating away.  I smiled as I watched his shear excitement over everything.  He is such a happy boy and just thrilled with life.  Every time we left he would ask "When are we goin' back to summer camp?"  He reminded me how great 'simple' is.

Asa was intrigued by the fire, loved to rock and cuddle, and ran over our toes repeatedly with his walker.  I can't remember what life was like without him and I don't want to.  He had a few 'firsts' on our vacation, not the least of which was a marshmallow, Samuel style :o) 

It's been a long time since I've built a card house... the kids thought I was cool :o)
That doesn't happen very often!!

Yes, I bribed him... a back rub for a s'more.  This kid will do anything for sugar!

And after the kids went to bed, I sat on the couch missing my sweet Rachel.  My heart was so full from all the fun with these guys and I just wished she could have been there too.  I got up and walked towards the bathroom and as I passed the woodstove, I noticed this by the fire....

 

I stood silently looking at the heart-shaped cardboard that had managed to survive the flames of the fire... perched on the edge of the stove while we bonded as a family in our favorite place on earth.  Seriously, do these things 'just happen'??  I don't think so.  I picked it up and smiled.  I miss her more than words can describe and often so much it confuses even me at times.  I didn't know it was possible to miss someone you hardly knew this deeply.... but I know she is ok and she's not that far away.  In this place, it felt like she was not only close, but right there with us.