my awesome nurse, Kim.... |
I prayed the whole way to the OR that I would come out of there with my live baby... An hour and a half later, I was being rolled down that same hall, back to my room, with my baby's body wrapped in a blanket, cradled in my arms, and absent of her soul.
Psalm 23:4-5
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil, for you are with me;
your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
I will fear no evil, for you are with me;
your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows
you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows
Today I thought about this a lot. I have most of the pictures from Rachel's birthday burned in my mind and so I could picture them in my head without actually looking at them. As I drove with this on my mind, I heard a song by Jeremy Camp called "There will be a day"....
I know the journey seems so long
You feel you're walking on your own
But there has never been a step
Where you've walked out all alone
Troubled soul don't lose your heart
Cause joy and peace he brings
And the beauty that's in store
Outweighs the hurt of life's sting
But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering
There will be a day with no more tears
No more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place
Will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we'll hold on to you always
And as I sang along, all I could think was "that was her day." It's kind of exciting to think about for her.
I said it out loud... "It was her day"
I started crying. I cried for a long time.
I might never walk with my girl to the park...
but I walked with her straight to "her day"
And we weren't alone.
God was with us.
Amen.
ReplyDeleteYour posts are so beautiful and encouraging. Thank you, Stacy.
ReplyDeleteStacy,
ReplyDeleteOnce again, you've moved me to tears. If only you knew just how much admiration and respect I have for you. BIG hugs, my sweet!
Love,
France~
And I was one of many who lifted you & Rachel (as well as Matt and the kids) up as you walked this part of your journey.
ReplyDeleteLove You, Mom
Such a beautiful thought . . .
ReplyDeleteLove you. Crying with you. I am so touched by the lyrics to this song this morning...I needed to hear them today - thank you!
ReplyDeleteHUGS!
I've thought the same for my sweet Ellis. There was a sense that day that we ushered him straight into the arms of Jesus. From our hands to His. Our little babies skipped all the hard stuff of this life. It makes it harder for us, but they are so blessed. Thanks for sharing your words and the song. It's encouraging me today.
ReplyDeleteIt was her day! and a beautiful day it was! I am walking right beside you in this hard jorney. Love the song! and love you. <3
ReplyDeleteEven before I read this post I was crying at the song playing. Love that song! Then I read the post and cried some more. Tears of joy for her being walked into His arms and tears of sorrow for you. Thanks for sharing this part of your journey.
ReplyDelete*Hugs*
Andrea
Love this post! God is so good! :)
ReplyDelete