Sunday, March 13, 2011

Good Mama

Rachel's stone is being shipped from India and is in route somewhere... It will be set in May sometime.  And you know me, we'll have a celebration!!  I sent the final OK in for the inscription last week.

We went after church to get her grave fixed up.  I was sad to see that 2 of the gifts that people left her had broken. I took most of the stuff home to make sure nothing else does...and cause it was starting to look cluttered.  I can't wait for her to have her stone.  I also took down the winter arrangement I made her, but I didn't have anything to replace it with yet :o(   So I just propped up her daisies and tulips in the basket.  It looks ok, I guess.  I want it to look more than ok though.

This winter has worn on me.  I'm so glad spring is on its way... but today, Des stepped on the ground above where Rachel is and her foot sunk in 6 inches.  I thought I was going to pass out and she wasn't too pleased either.  This is all just so hard.  I miss the days of innocence when I had no idea I would be spending my time caring for my baby at a graveyard.  Matt told me "you're a good Mama" as he watched me try to make it look pretty...  oh, how I wish he was saying that cause I just gave her a bath and combed her hair.

I guess "good Mama's" just do whatever has to be done.  She doesn't need a bath, she needs a pretty grave.


  1. Love the new look. I haven't seen anything about the book how is it coming along? Can't wait to read it.
    I give you credit. My daughters father was shot and killed last May and I have a very hard time going to see him. I never thought about why I don't go the cemetary until I had to with him. We had been through alot in the 17 years we had knowm each other. But in the end we had become very good friends. I have yet to explain to Kirsten why I don't like to go. I have to find the words.
    As always my lots and prayers are with you and your family. ~Bridget~

  2. Oh no I hope it wasnt my Lords Prayer plaque...I will definately be leaving something soon to replace it. I had a feeling it wasnt going to last long.
    So sorry :(

    We love you Rachel!


  3. My momma's heart is aching for you. Matt is right, you are a good momma! Whether in giving baths or in keeping your beautiful baby girl's grave beautiful. You are making the best of whatever situation you find yourself in. My prayers are with you especially today!!!
    Lots of love coming from here....

  4. We tend their graves b/c its one of the only things we can do for them now

  5. I can't wait for Lilly to have her stone either. You're right we do the best we can, that's all we can do as mommas to our babies who are no longer with us.


We so appreciate your words of encouragement!
Thank you! ♥ The Aubes